Heritage Transport Museum: A Photo Diary

If you are vehicle enthusiasts, head straight to this one-of-its-kind Heritage Transport Museum. Housed about 40 KM from Gurgaon, this stunning and well-maintained Museum is a goldmine for transit junkies, packed with information and dozens of the actual vehicles used to transport high-flying Indians over the past 150 years. Run by Mr. Tarun Thakral of Le Meridien, New Delhi, the museum houses an eclectic collection of vintage cars (from IMPALA to Pontiac), hand carts, palanquins, boats, a train compartment, Pakistani truck-art by famous artist Anjum Rana, and even a bi-plane. Built on a 3 acre complex, the museum is spread over four air-conditioned floors that offer over 100,000 square feet of exhibition space, library and reference centre, mini auditorium, souvenir shop, and cafeteria.

What’s on offer?

Take your kids on a walk through time and explore the history of transport in India, although I felt they need to make it more interactive for the kids. Lots of vintage cars, buses, mini Vespas to see; but they can’t really clamber or touch it, and that could be a little disappointing for little kids. (Disclaimer: I am not endorsing touching the displays here, in India you can’t really allow that). I felt a nice play area where kids can indulge in a vehicle-related activity would have been nice. Though, after checking the four floors of the museum kids can enjoy a day of painting, pottery, horse and camel ride in the outdoor plush green area—but they can do that anywhere, right?

Getting there

Finding the place was a little taxing for us as it is a bit far from Gurgaon, and the GPS showed 2 approaches— via Sohna or NH8. NH8 is recommended, and a possible landmark could be GITM College. The place itself is in the middle of nowhere so that made it a nice little road trip for us.

Mommy Tips:

• It felt great to visit a museum like this in India with great exhibits, informative displays and without any jostling for space.
• Cafeteria is running but there are limited things on offer (Pastas, Popcorns and Yippee noodles are not my thing)
• One can spend 3-4 hours easily exploring the museum
• Souvenirs are expensive as all the cars and trucks are designed and decorated by famous artist Anjum Rana. However, it’s worth paying for if you are into that kind of stuffs.
• The entire place is accessible by stroller and wheelchair

Verdict:

Highly Recommended.

#destinationunlocked #eyeforluxury #kidsdayout #daytrip #everythingvintage #parenting #placestovisit #mustvisit #museum

A version of this blog post also got published in Huffington Post India under my name. Here’s the link of that post.

http://www.huffingtonpost.in/mousume-roy/heritage-transport-museum-gurgaon-steer-the-kids-here-for-a-fu/?utm_hp_ref=in-

 

 

What The IKEA Play Report 2015 Tells Us About Indian Kids

Upside Down

I grew up in a small town where playtime used to be the highlight of our day. After school, we couldn’t wait to get home and get outside to play—be it racing the bicycles with friends, chasing the fireflies, or playing hide-and-seek—the memories are still pretty vivid in my imagination. Every day our parents had to fetch us back in the evening with a good amount of scolding, as the rule in the house was to come back once the street lights are on.

We grew up being physically active—much more than the current generation. Though, I don’t recall our parents taking any real apart in our play activity—barring those rare occasions when dad taught us backhand shots in badminton or how to fly kites; essentially, we (me and my sister) used to play on our own or with the neighbourhood kids.

Also, the notion of spending quality time with kids did not exist in those days; as adults were too busy running errands and making ends meet. My mom being a working lady in a time when it was not a norm, we even used to go to the library –some 5-8 km away from our home—all alone.

Sadly, the world is not as safe as it used to be.

As we are working parents, the nanny takes our son to the neighbourhood park every day in the evening, however, there are hardly any kids of his age-group there. So oftentimes, he wanders on his own with the nanny trailing right behind him, and after spending some time swinging and sliding, kicking the ball towards random strangers (usually retired-old guys), and making faces at whosoever indulges him, he returns back for his supper.

Sad, isn’t it? I know, but I would say it’s still better than him watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse at home with grandparents to fuss over him. In a recently conducted survey by IKEA— the Swedish furnishing company— calls India a “time-poor” country. They interviewed over 30,000 parents and children online across 12 countries, to learn about playing and how people spend their time together around the world.

India tops the charts on three fronts:

1. Spending Quality Time with Children:

60 per cent of Indian parents feel guilty about not spending enough time with their children — followed by China at 57 per cent. They not only feel stressed when playing with children but the children too feel their parents are always in a rush.

2. Safety Quotient:

75 per cent parents feel they are over-protective and don’t let their children play outside for fear of strangers or traffic. The US comes second with 62 per cent.

3. Digital Devices:

38 per cent parents say that playing on the smartphone or I pads qualifies as family time— China comes a close second with 31 per cent.

There is no news of IKEA Play Report 2015 anywhere in the Indian media. I guess, parenting and playtime doesn’t garner that much attention, nor does it do anything for the TRPs. I read about it in Indian Express the other day, apparently the only newspaper to cover it.

In the light of this study, what it means for us parents? We live in a time when houses don’t have a backyard and being outside the house doesn’t necessarily mean playtime. What is the answer to our nature-deprived modern lives? The answer is, we need to get outside more often. We need to pick a sport, play in the park, lie-down in the grass, plant trees, and pack a picnic; instead of teaching kid how to play Subway Surfer on I Pad, we need to show them how to kick a ball or do a cartwheel. Times are changing, if we want our kids to stop being a “couch potato”, we have to give play a chance!

“…Step with care and great tact and remember that Life’s a Great Balancing Act. Just never forget to be dexterous and deft. And never mix up your right foot with your left.”— Dr Seuss.

Tags: #playmatters #playtime #parenting #IKEAPlayReport2015

Happy Family Vacation

Friend, partners in crime, rivals…

I have one elder sister.

While growing up we fought like cats and dogs, and said some of the meanest things to each other, and later patched up as if nothing happened. We did some of the silliest things together, and laughed at jokes only we could understand.

But then she moved to the U.S and the Skype conversation and over the phone talks took a beating because of the time zone change, work and babies! Thus her arrival in India was something I was looking forward to with bated breath. The moment I saw her the years vanished like a fart in the wind, and we’re right back to where we’ve left it, that is, like nothing has ever been missing.

We recently visited them in Kolkata, and the overnight conversation against the high rising Rajarhat is something that I cherish the most. We had the best time with our parents joining in. The house was bursting at the seams, but in a good way. Also, watching the kids gel is something that took me by surprise as they all met for the first time. My nieces and nephew don’t speak Bengali or Hindi, and I was a bit skeptical about how Aurko will respond to their accented English. But boy was I wrong, kids speak their own language, they don’t need familiarity. Cousins laughed and giggled, husbands had long conversations, there were lots of slamming doors, chasing after boys, and hair braiding for girls.

As usual we (me n hubby) did a poor job of taking pictures and didn’t pull out the camera much. Partially because it was busy and there was so much catching up to do and so many stories to be recalled.

Princep Ghat

#Travel #Travelogue #Familyvacation #Cousins #Sisterdom #Sisterhood

Unsolicited Parenting Advice from Know-It-Alls

Oh wow! You are a baby expert as well?

So David Beckham is facing the wrath of trolls for allowing their baby girl Harper to use a dummy (pacifier) even at 4. What’s new in that for a parent, I say. From the moment you turn pregnant you will find “mom experts”, “baby experts”, and “parenting expert” crawling out of the woods from all corners.

You know what I mean? All the unsolicited parenting advice that is vomited on you once you are a parent, and it doesn’t matter if it’s your first baby or 5th …these people still know more than you. And expect you to listen.

OK! So I have nothing against the well-intentioned advice; I am not the sort who will roll eyes on some good motherly tips. But if I just met you on a lift…I don’t need you to tell me what to do and what not to do with my 3 year old.

Here I’ve listed some of the common sages (unsolicited of course); all parents must have come across in their parenting days.

1. Back in our days….

Brace yourself, mama! If you have anywhere to hide, better start running now, because when a sentence starts with THAT—you are in a sticky situation. Be prepared to be bombarded with outdated parenting tips from a generation who has never heard of Google.

How to handle?

A polite nod of head, and “Thank You”, because you cannot really argue with an old hump; you just have to grin and bear.

2. Isn’t he too old to be—?

This always makes me defensive and hurtful. My son still uses milk bottle (did I just hear you shriek). Yes, he does. He is obsessed with it and we are trying our best to wean him out. He uses his milk cup as well but when he is sleepy he prefers a bottle. I’ve faced a lot of wrath and gasp from strangers and relative but I’ve realized most of the time they may genuinely wonder if the behavior that they’re commenting on is age-appropriate.

How to handle?

Swallow the bitter pill. If they are offering an advice on what to-do than you might learn something. But if they are just boasting about their super-efficiency, put your hands over your ears and start singing..Wheels on the bus go round and round…..

3. My kids never did that…

I bet you have chanced upon that “middle-aged Mrs-know-it-all” with kids in college witnessing your child throwing a tantrum, and uttering that golden line.

Excuse me! But I barely remember what I did last week let alone what I did 20 years ago, Mam. What’s the secret of your super-memory?

How to handle?

Defuse your anger with a pinch of humor. Congratulate her on raising wonderful robots. Ask her if you can call her next time the child throws a fit.

The world is full of critics. There is always going to be information coming from parent, non parent, and everyone in between. Filter out what advice to listen to and what to blow off. Eventually, a funny thing happens—you become a “baby expert” in the process, and when your best friend has a baby, you will know exactly what to tell her.

This post is also published in Women’s Web as my article, go check it

How to Deal With Unsolicited Parenting Advice

Sri Aurobindo Ashram, Delhi

Sky scraping snow-capped Mountains, vast expansion of meadows, small quaint cafe, steep walks and groves, is what I’ve been longing for lately. Except reality couldn’t be any further from the truth. A mountain getaway now is completely off-limits, as the boy’s flu last month took away two-weeks off work.

Living in Delhi NCR, I have always missed the nature. There are no water bodies, no mountains or rivers to just sit by and stare, and do nothing. I stayed in Bhopal for a few years, and I have some fond memories of sitting by the lake chewing on roasted corn on weekdays. I couldn’t imagine doing that here as I am always in a hurry.

If only life could slow down a little? Some would say, there are enough parks and bawlis, old forts and ruins, India Gate and Lodhi Gardens but the distance and the crowd always spoils the appeal.

However, there is this place right in the heart of this city where life takes a different turn the moment you enter through the gate, where you can here the chirping of birds and not the traffic honking that you are so used to, where the whistling sounds of the woods are as clear as crystal, where the serenity and calmness stirs the poet inside you, where the trees play their own music, and even you are allowed to make some with the hanging instrument–minus the tourists, college crowds, or some such humdrums.

Just the sound of the nature playing its own tune!

I call it my Secret Haven.

Things I Swore I Will Never Do as a Parent—But Did!

Long before I had a baby or even had a reckoning for it, I made a list of things I swore I will never do as a parent. Needless to say I did not keep them, and “not keep them” has to be the greatest understatement, because there were times when I had bent backwards and crawled to the things I swore I will never do.

1. I swore I will never use TV/Mobile/IPad as a babysitter:

While growing up we had cable connection when I passed the 10^th board, my elder sister was in 1^st year Engineering at that time. All my friends use to harp about Disney Hour, Tara, Hip Hip Hurray, and stuffs, but not us—books were our entertainment. We did resent our parents for doing that to us, but later realized they did us a favour, if not we would never have developed this fondness for books.

So TV became this evil idiot box that I never much respected.

Fast forward today, my about-to-turn three year old knows the likes of Mother Goose Club, Chuggington, Mickey Mouse Club House, Masha and the Bear, and what not!

Long before the child happened, I always pictured myself laying down creative activities for him every evening. TV as a pastime – that’s not my style!

After popping out the peanut I’ve realized that he is simply not interested in anything I am not doing. So if I am tossing a salad, he wants to cook up a storm. If I am dusting the shelf, he wants to take over while knocking half of the book off the shelf.

So guess what comes to the rescue—Nanny TV!

2. No Bribing The Baby (KinderJoys, Car rides in Market, Cold Drinks, Red Cars)

I swore I won’t play such tricks on my baby! My bachelor self use to look down upon people who use to bribe their kids into doing things.

Nah, never me!

I would always offer a proper explanation. Oh yes, I would enlighten him and he would understand right away, of course. What’s so tough about making a 3-year old understand?

Fast forward today, after telling him not to empty his school bag in the bathroom for the 100^th time!

My only tactics is:

Aurko stop doing that if you want an orange Tang. Period

3. When Motherhood Fails

Last week was crazy, so crazy that every morning getting him ready for school was like a Warzone at home.

Baby, today is a blue day in your school. You want to wear the Mickey Mouse tee?

Nooooo! Wailing and howling… I want to wear yellow TEE, Mama!

Ok! Stop crying; let’s get you a bath first (he loves taking a bath)!

Nooooo! Still wailing and howling…I don’t want to take a bath!

See I’ve put these nice trucks in the tub?

Noooooooo! Why did you put my trucks in the tubs?

Blah! Blah! Blah!

What does mama do in situations like that? She scoops him out of the tub, drags him to the bedroom, force him to wear his school dress, and literally wish that she could bundle this child to Mars—while wiping those tears off her face!

Yes, that has happened a lot (lately)!

My child-less self always considered myself to be way classier and composed to let a three-year old run amock her neatly organized mind space!

Obviously, I’ve had the rudest awakening of my life!

But I’m clear now. I don’t roll my eyes and put on my headphones when I see a child sitting next to me on the plane. I am done commenting on somebody’s loud child in the supermarket. I don’t judge people when they bring their small child in the movie halls.

Because, in Jennifer Salaiz word:

That whore, karma, had finally made her way around, and had just bitch-slapped me right across the face.

A version of this blog post is published in Buzzing Bubs as my column, check it here http://www.buzzingbubs.com/articles/3-things-i-swore-id-never-do-as-a-parent

Slowing Down

The other day I came from work early to take the child to the market. He was surprised as he is not used to having me at that hour. As we made our way from the parking lot, he suddenly bends down to investigate on a dying Ant, I ask him to move quickly saying we will check on it later. Few steps, and he stops again this time to check on a bicycle pedal “mama, ita ki” (mama, what is this) trying to move the pedal with his hand. Exasperated, I ask him not to touch the pedal as I take the sanitizer out of my bag to clean his dirty hands.

All the way to the shop he at least made 10 stops for his little ministrations while asking all sorts of questions. “This is yellow colour” (this is yellow), “Mama tomar gadi” (mum your car). I found myself running out of patience and constantly yelling –“come along”, “hurry up”, “don’t do this, don’t do that” so on and so forth.

As I stood waiting for him outside the shop, he walks up towards me looking around like a country bumpkin, all pleased and happy; it suddenly dawned – why am I rushing him? I did not come home early, to yell. I came early to spend some time with him.

I not proud to accept that I am pretty restless when it comes to getting things done. I am not good at relaxing, and I miss out on things that are important in hurry. And, here I am missing out on what I cherish the most— seeing him grow, the new words he is picking, how he acts so mature sometimes, and wait, is he humming “one two buckle my shoe”? Now when did he pick it? Let alone sing it in such a squishy little voice.

As my newfound insight about me hit home, I try to put it in practice immediately, so what do I do? I grab him and ask him to repeat what he just sang. Urgh! Now when does a toddler ever do what he is told? If only I could shut my mouth for a change?

I remember reading an article on slow parenting few months back, where the author wrote “Watch your child, take a moment to drink them in”. I never paid any heed to “slow parenting” then, but now I am thinking. So when the child asked if he could climb the steps of the shop, instead of saying NO, I said “why not”.

Believe me those 10 minutes without uttering “watch your step” was tough. However, I observed, he was being careful and is taking his time to judge the distance between the steps. My little man is being responsible. What’s more, I was rewarded fairly soon when unaware he started humming “one two buckle my shoe”, and his sweet expression and serious focus on climbing those steps broke my heart from happiness. I could have missed it just as easily.

Ever since, I’ve been trying my level best to slow down and take it as easy as possible. We are saying NO to fancy outings in the malls; parks and pools are so much adventurous and he can lead the way without worrying mama, knowing she will follow at his pace —more for her sake than his.

Our vacation in Goa was seems like “slow parenting”; we did not make a to-do list and spent our days relaxing, soaking, communicating, and eating!

To Have or Not To Have!

Rock or Country? Indian or Continental? Beach or Mountain? One kid or two?

There is a tug of war going on in my head from the past few months, and I tried to keep it private hoping to find some clarity. As you can see, this whole privacy business is clearly not peeling any potatoes for me.

Hence, here I am pondering aloud about my mental maraca (read brain) which is filled with soft baby images. No, the images are not of a toddler, it’s of a tiny pink little pea-sized infant. Yes, I am going INSANE.

Weird as it may sound, it actually seems like a bigger life-decision to have a second child than whether to have one at all. In the time, when more and more people are opting for single child or choosing to have no children—especially working women—is this craving for another baby out of place? The biggest question we (me and my partner) are facing is the timing. I am just finding my feet back on the ground after the chaos of infancy and toddlerhood; my career is finally taking a shape. OK, so I am still not making six-figure salary but I do have a career, and I am enjoying it!

Should I forsake everything again to be changing diapers instead? Ideally, the time would be right when baby-1 starts proper school, I start freelancing, hubby buys an SUV, we move into a bigger house, and all that before I reach forty and travel to five countries.

Now who can beat that check-list!

I had a breezy first-pregnancy but somewhere deep-down I am still not able to shake this overwhelming fear of starting from the scratch. From pregnancy to middle of the night feedings, am I ready to do it all over again? Conversely, the feel of my changing body, intoxicating baby-smell, chubby cheeks and the whole process of infancy is too strong a feeling to put down.

What about baby-1? How will he handle having a little brother or sister? How will he react? Will he be jealous? On the other hand, who will my little man turn to when we are dead? Can friends and relative replace the bonds siblings share?

Phew, I don’t know! I am as confused as when I started writing this post. How about you? How many kids do you hope to have? Have you had a hard-time deciding on whether to have a second-baby or not?

Do share it with me and ease my running thoughts by writing on comments.

A gang of three sounds like such fun! Here’s a picture of my nieces and nephew!

A version of this post was published in Women’s Web website as my article, you can check it HERE.

Do I Really Want A Second Child?

 

Toddlers’ Theatre : Bends & Flows

Picture Courtesy http://www.Headstart.edu

I’m sitting in the base of S-47* Pansheel Park (a residential area) in South Delhi on a Sunday morning. On stage, Samta Shikhar & Bikram Ghosh is performing a new play, Bends and Flows, directed by Subhashim Goswami. But it’s the audience that is really striking. Toddlers and preschoolers all below the age group of three are seen bouncing on their parents lap with their eyes glued on the performer.

Family-friendly and delightful, Shikhar and Ghosh’s performance is thorough and well-researched work designed specifically for audiences this young. There is a clear dearth of plays and theatre for toddlers’ at least in Delhi (I don’t know about Mumbai & Bangalore), and this wonderful initiative is a welcome change. After becoming a parent, I’ve never taken our toddler for any LIVE show (even movies); I am very prickly of sideway glances and eye rolling. The thought put in by the Bends and Flows team is highly appreciable; firstly, the timing (11 am) perfectly suited a toddler, the venue (a no-nonsense room), and the exclusivity of the play and safe knowledge that everyone else in the theatre will have a baby made the show special for me as a mother. SO even though there were few wailing cries in between the performance—no one batted an eyelid.

My first experience of toddler play was Butterfly Kiss, a play directed by Elinor Agam Ben-David—performed by actor Hagar Tishman, last year. Though it was a wonderful play, what spoiled it for me is the presence of older kids. The children (above 5 years) filled the Stein auditorium in Indian Habitat Center with their parents and grand parent, and took the centre stage away from shy toddlers—the main addressee. Barring that the concept of the play was so simple and beautiful that it was actually a shame that the audience could not get the most out of it. In a more intimate setting, that show would have worked!

From what I reckon, the toddler requires more intimate settings and less distraction as they are yet to join schools (only few go to playgroups) and that the idea of too many people and a foreign environment can be intimidating for them. The slow and subtle approach with a check in number of attendees can make a huge difference.

This is where the Bends and Flows team scored. The director Subhashim Ghosh was standing right outside the auditorium, and he clearly made me feel at home even though my son got scared by seeing the new settings. So hats off to the Bends and Flows team, it is clearly a step in the right direction.

The cherry on cake for me was when out of the blue, Bikhram Ghosh started singing “Aha ki anondo akashe batashe” and it teleported me to the land of my childhood where Gupi and Bagha played a very important role.

Presented in collaboration with the Tadpole Repertory.

Performed by Samta Shikhar & Bikram Ghosh

Direction: Subhashim Goswami

Assistant Director: Neel Sengupta

Costume: Divya Jain and Virginia Rodriguez

Production: Anuj Chopra and Ankit Pandey

Lights: Anuj Chopra and Neel Sengupta

*S47 is an initiative of The Tejeshwar Singh Memorial Trust

P.S. I saw this play few months back and putting it on the blog now. But as they say better late than never. This play deserves more reviews and coverage than it got.

Hello World!

I know it’s little late in the day to start a parenting blog now, as my sass a frass little man is cutting his 2-yrs molars and is in the twilight zone (read “terrible twos”). And oftentimes when I ask for a smile I usually get a sulky meh.

Stop (s)mothering me…yadda yadda…!

PUHLEASE!  I am not perturbed by his age. If anything, I better start blogging now then later when he grows demonically embarrassed by me.

So with fluttering hearts and wobbly fingers I am starting a new journey today, and I would love to give you a glimpse of our life living in Delhi NCR, minus the cliches!

Wish me luck!

Mousume